Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
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