they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
