please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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