What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
My vagina is officially offended.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
