Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
They are going to name an STD after you.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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