last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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