we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize