ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
