All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
