i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
