Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
