I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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