SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Randomize
