whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
