I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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