I am in a vortex of obligation.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
