So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Randomize
