It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
