is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
