love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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