This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
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