therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Randomize
