If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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