We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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