New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
