You're completely useless in the revolution.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Randomize