Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
