no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Randomize
