God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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