There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Randomize
