what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
