just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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