I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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