He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
