Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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