whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
