This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
