# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
