you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
His nipple licking is glorious
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