My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
