After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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