I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
