this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
