Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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