Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize