fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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