The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
Holy shit dude........stairs
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize