Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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