I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize