i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
